Jim Wallace, editor of Sojourners Magazine, spoke in Pasadena on Monday night as one of many stops for his current book tour. His talk was engaging and for a moment I felt as though I was living my short stint in Los Angeles again where I was studying social justice issues and movements on a daily basis. I miss those days. The problem with this is that there is no reason those 'days' should be behind me. The pursuit of justice should be an integral part of my life and yet....It's not. I'm undisciplined and quite frankly, comfortable. This bothers me.
I'm like the overweight person that knows I need to eat less and better foods in order to drop the weight but following through with the action is most difficult.
A recent post by my sister in law entitled I am the problem brought a bunch of loose strings together in my head. My darling SIL reviews a passage from the book Blue Like Jazz. Donald Miller, the author, upon contemplating his social conscience and realizing humans always blame someone else or some other entity, i.e. corrupt government, the rich, etc....comes to the conclusion that ultimate blame lies on the individual. Miller writes, "The problem is not a certain type of legislation or even a certain politician; the problem is the same that it has always been. I am the problem. "
I have been coming into these thoughts recently. They're not bad. just hard to accept. I don't enjoy taking a hard look at myself and realizing how far away I've gotten from my original ideals and how many exceptions I've made along the way with weak justification. Whether it's buying clothes from notorious sweat shop run Old Navy, or getting really excited that Tom's of Maine toothpaste is $2.00 cheaper at Wal-Mart, or working way outside the community in which I live which means long drive time and huge gas consumption, or not being financially responsible when my husband and I clearly make twice as much money now than when we were married less than 2 years ago, or not spending time with my step-son because I work and go to school and 'am not his real mom,' or or or or....My list could infinitely continue. Ultimately, I AM THE PROBLEM. I choose to do the things I do. My actions perpetuate injustice and sin.
My thesis in college was titled "Giving a Damn." I wrote that every choice we make every decision we we come to ultimately reflects our theology and our morals. From the car we drive, to the food we consume, all points to something much greater and far more important.
While I'm not ready to turn my blue jeans in for homespun I will work on myself issue by issue and examine my heart and look for the ultimate call of God in my life. I want to change. I want to always be changing--but towards something far greater than the location where I live, the company I work for, or the car that I drive. I will pursue God and meaning and justice. I have a long way to go.
I'm like the overweight person that knows I need to eat less and better foods in order to drop the weight but following through with the action is most difficult.
A recent post by my sister in law entitled I am the problem brought a bunch of loose strings together in my head. My darling SIL reviews a passage from the book Blue Like Jazz. Donald Miller, the author, upon contemplating his social conscience and realizing humans always blame someone else or some other entity, i.e. corrupt government, the rich, etc....comes to the conclusion that ultimate blame lies on the individual. Miller writes, "The problem is not a certain type of legislation or even a certain politician; the problem is the same that it has always been. I am the problem. "
I have been coming into these thoughts recently. They're not bad. just hard to accept. I don't enjoy taking a hard look at myself and realizing how far away I've gotten from my original ideals and how many exceptions I've made along the way with weak justification. Whether it's buying clothes from notorious sweat shop run Old Navy, or getting really excited that Tom's of Maine toothpaste is $2.00 cheaper at Wal-Mart, or working way outside the community in which I live which means long drive time and huge gas consumption, or not being financially responsible when my husband and I clearly make twice as much money now than when we were married less than 2 years ago, or not spending time with my step-son because I work and go to school and 'am not his real mom,' or or or or....My list could infinitely continue. Ultimately, I AM THE PROBLEM. I choose to do the things I do. My actions perpetuate injustice and sin.
My thesis in college was titled "Giving a Damn." I wrote that every choice we make every decision we we come to ultimately reflects our theology and our morals. From the car we drive, to the food we consume, all points to something much greater and far more important.
While I'm not ready to turn my blue jeans in for homespun I will work on myself issue by issue and examine my heart and look for the ultimate call of God in my life. I want to change. I want to always be changing--but towards something far greater than the location where I live, the company I work for, or the car that I drive. I will pursue God and meaning and justice. I have a long way to go.
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